Within the first 6 months of my being single I started talking to a man who seemed interesting and fun. We had some common interests and text “conversations” always seemed easy-going. Before long he asked to meet me for dinner. I agreed and time and place was arranged.
We meet at a local restaurant and thankfully he looks like his pictures. He seems to have the same playful attitude that he portrayed via text so we go and grab a table. We make idle conversation as we order our food. It wasn’t until the waitress had taken our order that the proverbial Shit hit the fan.
I made the mistake talking about my kids and I saw his face kind of darken a bit. Seeing as they are a part of my life the subject was bound to come up eventually…and if he wanted to get to know me he’d have to be ok with that.
I asked him what was wrong and he looked like he was about to cry. He then goes on to tell me about his kids. Twins, who were both stillborn. He’s completely devastated (as he should be) and goes on to tell me that his ex-wife left him because being around him reminded her too much of the babies they lost. Uhhh….
As much as it was absolutely horrible that this happened to him….I’m screaming inside “GET ME OUT OF HERE!” By the time the waitress comes with our food, the man is a blubbering mess. The waitress gives me a dirty look like I just broke his heart or something. WTF? Through the whole thing I try to be supportive (since I’m kind of stuck there) and try to steer the conversation in a different direction. Nope, not happening. I get to hear it ALL.
Perfect. Note the sarcasm.
In the end we finish dinner and he asks me if I would like to go for a drive. I very politely decline stating that I have to work in the morning and it’s getting late. I will admit this was an outright lie. This guy needs a psychologist, not a date.
From that point on I made sure that any first meetings I had provided a way of getting out of quickly. Mainly going for a coffee and a walk. I can usually tell within 5 minutes if I can stand being around a person….and I sure as hell do Not want to be in the receiving end of another man’s mental breakdown..