I think there were two messages before I asked this man what made him try Plenty of Fish. As you can see the conversation went totally awry at no fault of my own. I even warned him that he was giving me too much info….yet he still gave me more. This man is obviously still hurting and should spend some time with friends and family before he tries to find himself a woman.
It is my experience that if someone has verbal/textual diarrhea when it comes to their ex then they ARE NOT over them.
Men have to get that bringing up other women insults your date. Women don’t get jealous since it’s just a first date, it’s because the man is openly comparing us to other women. Keep that shit to yourself! We get nervous enough and the key is to make your date feel comfortable to want to open up….not create a competition.
I’ve met a few guys described in that post and I still get a text or two once in a while from them asking me out again.
This is a screen shot of the first time anyone has remotely asked me to “hook up” on Twitter…and I’m using the nicer words as the picture says it all! I’m not a fan of direct messages (DMs). Usually they are annoying automatic messages thanking me for following while directing me to their website to sell me something. Ugh.. If I want to go to the person’s site I will freakin’ click on the link they provide in their profile!
I guess I should have asked if Twitter was a hook up site as it’s clear that this guy was trying to use it as such. I understand and LOVE that I can write raunchy tweets on Twitter. It suits my personality and how I write much more than Facebook where my close friendsand family might think I’m just whacked. (It’s a possibility they already do…) 😛 That being said, you just Don’t message people with crap like this….on ANY site. especially if you have Never talked to the person before.
I checked the guys pictures and he was hot. That being said, if he’s using Twitter to try and get his dink played with it’s either not him or there is something super wrong with him in another way. Perhaps he has one of these…
Last night I found myself with nothing much to do. I had spent roughly 6 hours working on my lawn in the hot sun and treated myself to a New York steak at the Lonestar. A male friend was texting me while I ate and an idea formed in my head. I clicked the Join button on the POF app the make it show that I would be attending the event.
I had seen the Plenty of Fish event for Oshawa posted many times and always thought it would be fun to check it out and write a review. (As I did HERE for the Ottawa POF Event.) In the back of my mind I had it as a back up plan if I didn’t find something to do. My idea was to take my friend with me and enter the event separately so I could get a perspective from both sexes. I figured that if the event was anything like the one in Ottawa that my friend would be attacked by all the single cougars.
Sadly, I arrived at my friends place to pick him up and he chickened out! I tried to convince him to come be my bodyguard instead but to no avail. Within 10 minutes of arriving I was off to Oshawa. An hour or so later I was in Oshawa following my GPS to where the event was being held. I made sure to check-in on Facebook as the only person who knew where I was at that point was the friend I tried to get to come along. At least if I disappeared the authorities had a starting point. 😛
I arrived at Whisky John’s at midnight. I think this was a good time as this meant people would have a few drinks in them and hopefully would be more social. I was wrong. It seemed like there were a lot of wall flowers there. Quite literally there was a line of older “bigger” men along the wall shrouded in darkness watching the door. I walked in, saw this then saw at least 3 of them check their phone revealing a blue glow. I could only guess they were checking their POF App because they all looked up at me and nodded their heads in recognition. That’s what I get for making it known I would be there. A little creepy but I guess I did it to myself…
I took a seat at the bar where there was light and ordered a drink. The bartender makes yummy Caesars I might add. I nursed that drink for almost an hour as I took in the rest of the event.
I was quite surprised to see that despite the wall of creepy men I first saw there was a younger crowd as well. There seemed to be something or someone for everyone there. The music was great for dancing and had a good range of styles. Even a TV with football for those who just wanted to sit and drink. It wasn’t as crowded as I thought it would be. I remember the Ottawa event was absolutely packed and you could barely move. It wasn’t the case here. The music was loud enough to dance but not too loud to talk. They had lots of pool tables too which is great for people who feel like doing something else while they chat.
It wasn’t long before my eye caught a couple that looked about mid-forties. They were seated across the bar from me in my direct line in sight. The woman was talking and the man was watching and hopefully listening intently….as that’s what it looked like he was doing. Every time I scanned the room I came back to them for a few seconds. I guessed I looked too long once because the man caught me. Ahh crap.. After that almost every time I looked at him after my scan he would glance up at me. The woman got up hugged the man, kissed him on the cheek and presumably went to the bathroom. The man got up too then looked over at me with a look and head raise that made me think he wanted to come over to me. Double crap! I looked down at my drink, sucked the rest of it back and got up to leave.
Just as I pushed my glass to the end of the bar one the wall flowers appeared out of no where beside me. He asked if he could buy me another drink. I politely declined and said I was leaving. I quickly left and went to my car. As I said, I nursed that drink for an hour. Does that mean this guy was watching and waiting for me to finish for that long? He couldn’t come talk to me first as it was clear I was there alone? Hmm… Kind of strange, nice, but strange.
I think if I were to go again I would have to bring friends. I could have easily had a great time there if I had people to talk to.
Picking and choosing who and what we are attracted to is up to us right? Some would argue yes and some would argue no.
If you said yes then you’re probably thinking that you like someone because of attributes you chose that you want. This could be anything from physical appearance, personality characteristics, or what kind of car they drive.
For those who say no you may have come to the realization that a lot of what we are attracted to has been environmentally ingrained in us from birth. Things we like/dislike in a person have been taught to us by our parents, caregivers, etc as we grew up. In this respect it means we naturally and unconsciously seek out what has been planted in our psyche. I know from experience that it is very difficult to deviate from our “attraction zone.”
Sadly, this can also make us appear shallow. Can a man help that he prefers a woman with larger breasts? Can a woman help that she prefers a man who is taller than her?
Sometimes it just doesn’t matter how awesome a person is or how great their personality is. If you can’t imagine yourself eventually having sex with that person then there is no point in dating them.
I have no idea what made me think it was a good idea to make a video. I probably did about 52….hundred takes before I got one that I was semi-happy with. No editing, no camera crew….just me being me. Let me know what you all think other than I look pretty pastey….lack of sun and make up know-how makes Another Single Woman look like…well, you’ll see. 🙂
There you have it. Any questions or comments, let me know. 🙂
I was at work last night and to say the least it was a long night. As I’m a multi-tasker my head is always thinking of things I might want to write about. On my break I made myself laugh with this addition to Twitter:
I’m broke and sexually frustrated. I don’t know which one I’m more upset about.
Then I wondered, which one would I rather if I could choose….I’m still sitting on the fence when it comes to this one. For shits and giggles I made my first poll. Which one would you choose? Add a comment and tell me and my readers why you made that choice. 🙂
For those of you who use Plenty of Fish I’m sure you’ve all seen the title of this blog, “User has been deleted.” At first you think, what did that person do to be deleted? They seemed nice. You know what..they probably were, but they deleted their account of their own free will.
I deleted my Plenty of Fish account today (for the millionth time) and all the people I had talked to (and not blocked) now see “User has been deleted” where the conversation once was. I may have to contact POF about this. Perhaps ask them to add something to their code that differentiates between if the person was deleted by staff or deleted it themselves.
I wouldn’t care so much if I lived in a big city….but I do not.
For the record, no, haven’t found a man. Just tired of it all…until I get bored again and go back on. I did get a little offended when a guy sent me a message saying,
“You’ve been on here a long time, what’s wrong with you?”
Ha! More like what’s wrong with you?!? …and the rest of the hard drug smoking, jobless, sex crazed men which is the epitome of what this area has to offer. This guy listed himself as “unimployed” , had a complete list of all the video games he likes to play and had a picture of himself with drugparaphernalia in the background.
Have you ever started talking to someone from online or otherwise where it’s an almost daily thing. You get to know their schedule and when or when not to expect messages. You’re getting to know each other and sometimes the conversations can lead way past when you should be sleeping for work in the morning. Also, they make sure to tell you that their phone is on them all the time so text any time.
Then…all of a sudden…nothing…or almost nothing. It’s gone from all the time to:
“Text me if you’re bored and I’ll ignore it like I’m busy.”
What happened? I mean, really…what happened?
It’s been my experience that when this happens the person has found someone else. In essence it means that even though the person was acting like they were into you, it also means they were still looking. Perhaps they were into you and someone better looking, more money, or nicer car came along. Or worse, the person was married or has a girlfriend.
I call this type of behaviour “The Disappearing Act.” No one really knows why it happens. All I know for sure is that it wastes my time….which for anyone who knows me it screams DISRESPECT. Sure, I’ve been entertained by the conversation but it doesn’t mean I’m doing it for the good of my health.
I’ve had it where someone will talk to me for a week on the dating site then go silent, yet they still appear online. After another week I get a random message from the person with their phone number. You know what I did? I ignored it. I didn’t message back or text their number. This is a classic example as the person using me as a back up. No, thanks, not interested.
Sadly, there is nothing we can do about this behaviour. We have to live with it as it comes but when it does, don’t condone it. Ignore the person if they contact you again or call them out. Everyone has emergencies and can’t be available all the time, but we aren’t talk about that.
Let’s take control and make it:
“Text me but I’m ignoring YOU because you’re a time wasting jerk!”
As always, comments, questions, orders for my non-existant book are always welcome. 😛
P.S. This behaviour is not limited to just men, us women do it too. I don’t. I just get classified as a bitch when I say I’m not interested.
I have often complained using Facebook, Twitter or directly to my friends about what people do (or don’t do) when they are attempting to meet people online. I’ve started documenting some of this on my phone using the Screen Capture function. I’ve modified the screen shots to hide the person’s username and face for their privacy. I didn’t hide me…well, because you all know it’s me! 🙂
I want you to look closely at this picture. First I was taking a picture of the fact that once again another man has made the typo of “women” instead of “woman”. Second. I noticed that he says he’s looking to find someone to marry. I have often wondered if these men subliminally don’t know what they want so they type “women” and their brain just doesn’t register the typo. I have seen it A LOT so it’s not just this guy.
Here we have a classic example of either someone who is Really new to online dating or is just lazy. I do realize that not every person is going to respond to every message they get but at least try to put some effort into it. Saying just “hi” or “hello” is not acceptable. That being said, I have received the opposite before as well. I’ve had people send me paragraphs in a First message where I had to reply that I wasn’t interested for whatever reason (distance, etc). Sadly, due to my frustration with these people I sometimes reply in a bit of a bitchy manner. You see this in this message and will see more of it in some other screen shots. In his profile he lists that he has a Masters Degree and bunch of other intellectual “stuff”. Impressive but what’s he going to do? Walk around with his degree stapled to his shirt and hope it gets him past the awkward moment when all he says is “Hi.” ???
This guy here lists himself as wanting a relationship. His profile seemed decent and he looked good too so I figured I might as well send a message. It wasn’t long before he kept trying to carry the conversation in a different direction. As you can see from the screen shot I called him out on it. It’s no wonder us women get confused then get defensive when a real man messages us. Yes, the messages were happening after midnight but it was a Tuesday night and I was at work….so it’s less likely the guy was drunk…less likely but who knows!
I am not going to judge someone for not having a car. In this day and age cars/gas are getting more and more expensive. I have dated men who do not have cars but they usually lived in the same city as myself. Lately I’ve had many men from all over (20km and more) message me and want to meet me yet they have no mode of transportation. They either expect that since I have car that I’m going to come get them or they offer me money for the gas. I’m sorry but I am Not a taxi. When it comes to something like that I expect 50/50. Gas money and driving time…because Time is a HUGE deal when you’re a parent.
This man is in his early 40’s and I normally wouldn’t have seen his profile but he had checked me out. I clicked on it and he had only the one picture on his profile. Classic bathroom picture yet he’s wearing Sunglasses. So, being the bitch that you all know I can be, I call him out on it. He says he wants casual/no commitment and writes that he’s looking for “fun excursions”. We all know what that means… He tries to explain himself out of it but I’m not buying it at all. He then shared with me another picture where he looked NOTHING like his original picture…as in way older and heavier. I don’t care if a man is burly. It looks good on most men…but don’t hide yourself and think it’s going to be ok when the person finally see what you Really look like. Everyone deserves to be loved but no one deserves to be lied to!
There is just NO helping this guy. He seems to think it’s perfectly OK to tell a woman he’s only just started talking to that his “Junk” is “hairless”. Wow, as you can see I was quite surprised to read that. Where he says he’s sorry in the first message I had just finished explaining that certain comments come across badly over text.
Well, I hope you all got a good laugh at some of the stuff I’ve had to deal with. I’m starting to think I should try speed dating as this online thing doesn’t seem to be working out. 😛
I help fund this site and other things in my life with free PayPal gift cards I earned on Swagbucks.com. I run the phone Apps while I sleep or do a survey here and there if I feel like it on my laptop.
My mom wishes I would write a book already. She also wishes I would win the lottery already, which--despite never having purchased a lottery ticket before and never planning on purchasing one--is somehow decidedly more likely.