Tag Archives: military

The Pink Panties

There are times when you feel like throwing caution to the wind and just going with the flow. There are also times where there are red flags and you should not ignore them. The experience I’m about to tell is one of those.

In about April of this year I found myself with a weekend off where my kids were with their dad. It was Saturday afternoon and plans I had made with friends had fallen through. A man had started sending me messages on POF. Another military man from the base located an hour from me. He seemed decent enough that after a couple hours of messages back and forth, I accepted his invitation for dinner.

I made the hour long drive to his city as there was more things to do there than in mine. We met at a restaurant and everything seemed cool. I will add that he was VERY French. As I’ve met quite a few men from the military on POF I’ve become used to filtering out the accent. I sometimes think it’s funny to hear how they say certain English words…even my own name as it starts with an H….H’s are difficult for them and I know this. 😛

We had a nice drink and chat at the first restaurant then he suggest going to another because he had discovered I loved wings. Everything seemed normal except I learned that he was only recently single for a month and that his ex girlfriend (also military) was still in the process of moving out. Hmm…

After eating I seemed comfortable with him enough to accept his invitation to watch some Big Bang Theory at his place. Yes, I know…you shouldn’t go to a guys house you just met but it had started raining. I wasn’t ready to go home yet and the rain made it so a walk would have been dismal.

I should have gone home.

I went to his place which was a small basement apartment. He had explained he was moving in another week to a house he had bought in a new subdivision. We settled on the couch and he made sure to sit right beside me and snuggled up. At this point I didn’t mind because who doesn’t like to snuggle?

About half way through the episode I had to use the washroom. He directs me to go through his bedroom where the bathroom is on the other side. I passed a drying rack on my way but had to go so bad something didn’t register at first. When I came out I did a quick sweep of the room with my eyes….because I’m nosy that way.

Fantasy novel (in French) by the bed, clothes neatly folded on the dresser, boxes half filled looking like he’s ready to move and pink panties hanging off the drying rack. PINK PANTIES? WTF…? This guy was 6’3″ and easily a muscular 190-200lbs. There is no freakin’ way he could fit into those.

That being said, he had told me his ex was in the process of moving out. I don’t know about you all…but if I’m moving out of someone’s place I’m pretty sure I’m not going to leave my PINK underwear hanging around, quite literally. As well, if my ex left his underwear hanging around I would have either burned it or thrown it in a garbage bag for them to pick up.

I went back out to his living room and pretended I hadn’t seen anything. I didn’t sit as close to him though. We watched the rest of the episode and he indicated that he wanted to make out with me. I decided I had nothing to lose said sure, if he could say my name.

Remember the whole “H” thing couple with the French accent? I wanted to get in one last laugh before I left this loser.

“Say my name.”

He shakes his head no.

“Come on, I want to hear you say it.”

“I cannot.”

“Really? It’s that hard?”

“Oui.”

“Oh I get it…do you even remember my name?” I ask jokingly.

He shakes his head.

Nice. What the fuck? I know I texted my name to him before I met him and I knew his name..and had said it a couple times. This indicated that he didn’t care to remember or know it.

It was at this point where my phone started ringing and it was coworkers wondering where I was. I usually attend local UFC showings with them….and usually the one who drives their drunk asses home. I used this excuse as my quick exit, but not before noticing a few pairs of high heeled shoes shoved to one side in the entry way. Hmm..

Needless to say I never contacted that guy again. I came to the conclusion that his girlfriend must have been on some course with the military and/or was out of town at that time. There is also the idea that she was staying at their new house while he was supposed to be packing. Who knows…I don’t…and I don’t care to know.

Le sigh.

Advertisements

1 Comment

Filed under Dating, OKCupid, Online Dating, POF, Single

He Has a Head Injury

We all meet those people where there is just no connection when it comes to dating or even friends. What do we do with these people? If they seem interested in you it’s not really fair to string them along. I’ve learned that the best way is to let them down gently…although if they don’t accept it graciously then that’s when I get pissed off.

Here is an example that happened to me about a year ago:

I met a man off Plenty of Fish who once again seemed all good on paper. We texted a bit then had a phone conversation. That went well (except I thought his voice was very monotone) so we had decided to meet. As I was on night shift that weekend we met for coffee after my shift ended at 7am.

This is where things went a little awry. We met and thankfully he did look like his pictures. When we started to talk it was a bit like pulling teeth. I gave him the benefit of the doubt that he may have been nervous. After a short while he started to open up….to tell me ALL the SAME stories he had told me on the phone. There was a lot of “yep, you told me that already.”

Apparently the man had suffered a head injury and I wish I was joking about this. He had been doing training for a policing position and had gotten injured. He had to forego the rest of the training…but apparently was all good when it came to the military, his current profession. He can’t pull people over to give them tickets but he’s allowed to shoot weapons…..what? He had explained, twice now, that the head injury effected his memory.

To make a longer story short the man had zero personality. Every time I tried to talk about something he would refer back to one of his limited stories and like a broken record go into the full story again. The “Get me out here” factor was definitely engaged. After an hour I politely told him I had to go so I could sleep for my shift that Saturday night.

I wake up to get ready for my shift on the Sunday night and read this text message on my phone:

“I haven’t really heard from you. Don’t you like me?” (paraphrasing as this was a year ago)

Now it’s obvious to you all, I didn’t…but since he’s just not my type, I was nice.

“It was really great meeting you but I don’t feel we have a whole lot in common. I’m open to being friends if you like.”

His reply:

“Oh, I see. That’s ok. I’ve already met someone else and I like her better. She’s younger and prettier…and the kids thing kind of freaks me out.”

WHAT? Oh no…he didn’t. Oh…but he did. We definitely aren’t going to be friends especially after my reply to this intentionally hurtful message. I set up my phone to be able to block his number immediately after I send him this message:

“Wow, that was cowardly. I sent you a respectful message and that is what you send me? I’m going show you the same respect you showed me and tell you exactly what I think about you. I think you’re Dumb as Fuck. Your head injury effected more than just your memory. Don’t bother replying. You number will be blocked as soon as I hit send.”

Juvenile on my part, maybe. I don’t usually stoop down to an idiots level, but I felt at that time it was warranted. The nerve that he insult not only my age, looks and the fact that I have kids…ALL of which he knew before he met me.

On to the next…

——————

UPDATE:

This guy recently contacted me again via Plenty of Fish. His message said hello and told me that he as single again after dating a girl for 10 months. I simply replied with,

“Are you that whacked to think I would really give a shit?”

I waited about 30 seconds to make sure the message had gone through…then I Blocked him. The only thing about that is once I block someone and I have sent a message, I don’t know for sure if they get the message. Ahh well, drama averted!

3 Comments

Filed under Dating, Online Dating, POF, Single

The newest one..

I started talking to a man about a week ago. Not sure why I keep talking to him. The man already has two strikes against him and he doesn’t even know it. For those who don’t know, both my exes have the same first name. This man also has this name. My mother swore she would shoot me if I dated another man with that name….so strike one. The next, he works for the military. Awesome career…but I have two kids. I’m not able to move if they get posted elsewhere. My children’s father is here. I refuse to leave them and cannot take their father from their life.

Some would say I’m being too picky and that I should just let love happen. As great as that sounds….I believe the fear of heartache again has won when it comes to this man.

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized